What does "to forgive someone"/"to be forgiven" imply?
Does it mean: I hurt someone, I say "I am sorry" and live on?
Or: Someone does me harm, says "I'm sorry" and everything is fine?
What about the wounds in our souls and minds?
Cicatrized and forgotten? Or cicatrized and NOT forgotten?
What about the open wounds?
We all have offended, hurt or wounded someone. Consciously or not. We all have asked for forgiveness. It's part of life.
But when is "something" really forgiven? When are you really forgiven for what you did?
Is hearing "I'm sorry" enough? Are there situations that are "unforgivable"?
Is something forgiven when it no longer hurts? When it's forgotten?
What about the wounds that no longer hurt but are not forgotten?
Oh my. It's complicated.
I can't speak for everybody but I know my wounds.
Hearing "I'm sorry" helps.
Time certainly helps as well.
Understanding why a person did what he did/said what she said, too.
Accepting my soul's wounds as part of life also.
What about trust though?
I had to turn 50 to understand that to forgive someone doesn't automatically include trusting again.
What a big relief to realize that I could indeed forgive someone but that I could, at the same time, decide not to trust this person any longer. I may trust again in the future. Just not for the time being.
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I don't know who Henry Cloud was but he certainly was a wise man :-) |